In relationships, many suffer from what I call infatuation guilt. This is when you meet a person and the feelings were off the chain, very explosive, one could not eat or sleep thinking about that man or woman. After about two to three months and sex, one or both have lost that loving feeling.
Believe it or not, the reaction can be measured biologically within the brain by its secretion of Phenylethylamine. Your body actually experiences this exhilarating feeling similar to that of cocaine or ecstasy. Yes, it can be a drug! But do you know why? It’s a natural process that is designed to continue the species and help us to reproduce. This is why so many say, “We had amazing chemistry” but I said that it was only a natural high like using drugs.
What we all should know is that love does not create this type of high within itself. Yes, you can have chemistry with love, but love in itself is a strong connection between two souls.
But the nature of this article is to help you to understand how one can become guilty for having strong loving feelings in the beginning but no longer feel the same way. Many relationships are continued because of guilt or loneliness. Meaning that most of us do not want to be alone and use the other person to pass the time away until one can find an upgrade in man or woman.
This is why he or she keeps cheating or talking to other men or women. They are either seeking that feeling again or just trying to find something better. Sorry, but they are seeking to no avail.
I hope you are not disappointed about what I’m about to say but please understand that all the novels and movies you read and see that makes you feel or say “Aweeee, that’s so special!” It usually not the case! They always show this perpetuate high and love at first sight romance in the movies and books.
True love does not work this way at all!!! Yes, there is a connection at first but the feeling of love requires time to develop. Also true love usually grows and changes within the relationship. You do not have a steady high like infatuation that eventually fades and never comes back…
Stop feeling guilty and man up or woman up and let this person know how you really feel. If you are honest, maybe this can be a person you will grow to love via values and understanding. Stop searching for that feeling. Always evaluate the relationship instead of the person you are with. We always think we can do better and upgrade our current love affairs. The question should be, ‘are you doing better in this relationship” than ever before? If you evaluate the person, their skills, education, you may become confuse as to whether or not it would work. Instead, you should know how this person makes you feel in the relationship.
Think of a relationship like a 3 leg stool, first there is you, your mate and the relationship. One leg can not be supported without the other. So the relationship is a leg all by itself and you should judge this more than you are judging your mate.
Again, remove the guilt, be honest and allow the chips to fall wherever they do. If you are not too attached to the outcome of the relationship, it could be a start of true lasting love. You see your soul mate could be that person you are looking at right now; but just don’t know it yet. Think about it!